Monday, January 14, 2013

Kids say the damnedest things*


*Hi Mom, no, I'm not swearing for no reason, it goes with the story. 

While I was growing up, any time my dad whacked his thumb with a hammer (not too often) or almost cut his toe off with a chainsaw (more often), a few choice words would slip out. But my parents made sure I knew that they were bad words that I was under no circumstances permitted to say.

One summer day when I was a toddler, my extended family was all gathered on the porch at the family farm. I somehow hurt myself and said "ow!" and everything was going along just swell-ly until I turned to my father and opened my mouth again.

"Daddy! I didn't say damn it! I didn't say dammit, Daddy! Because dammit's a bad word! So I didn't say dammit!" I'm sure I threw in a few more "dammits" for good measure. Just to make sure, you understand. I was a classy two-year-old.

Also, this one time when I was six and mad at my friend I said "damn" in my head. I felt so guilty that I confessed to my dad, who awkwardly patted my head and said, "Well, um, don't...think it... again...?"

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